Guest Blog by Shelley Wilson
I’m a great believer in living life to the fullest and embracing every opportunity that comes your way. However, I didn’t always appreciate this outlook on life opting to ‘wing it’ for the most part. It was only when I faced the biggest challenge of my life that I realised the power of the Universe, and how important it is to be your most authentic self.
Thirteen years ago I walked away from an emotional and physically abusive marriage. I packed my three children, then two, three, and five years old, into the car with anything I could carry before stepping into an unknown future. It was the best thing I would ever do.
My children are all teenagers now; happy and healthy, and successful in their own right. My decision could have had a catastrophic impact on them, but instead, I was able to show them how to manage their destiny and never settle for what society expects of you.
It took me a long time to realise that being a single mum didn’t mean losing myself in the process. Having dreams, ambitions, and a life outside ‘mum’ was just as important. The pain I struggled with was emotional. All the physical scars had faded years ago, yet I was still holding on to the past and allowing this pain to predict my future.
Thirteen years later and I’m still single, having never found the strength to ‘put myself out there.’ The thought terrifies me to the core and will be something I continue to work on for a while yet. Having said that, I have made impressive progress in other aspects of my personal development. I could have fallen apart after my divorce, but I took the experiences I’d been through and learned from them. I shaped them into lessons choosing to be a survivor rather than a victim.
Re-shaping the way we think and act upon any of life’s curve balls is what allows us to evolve. I learned how to find inner peace and a strength that I never knew existed inside me before. I believed that I was broken beyond all repair, unlovable, weak, and a failure, but once I found the determination to face my problems and re-think how I saw them, I was able to utilise the lessons and grow.
It took time, but eventually, I saw my life as a blank canvas just waiting for me to add the swirls and patterns, and the splashes of colour. Simple life hacks such as picking and choosing who I follow on social media were beneficial to shaping the life I wanted. Surrounding myself with positive people who filled my heart with joy became my aim. I no longer wanted to be dominated by such negativity and darkness. I lived and worked as my authentic self, serving the community as a holistic health practitioner and tutor, and making sure that my well-being was at the top of my to-do list. I knew that I couldn’t help others if I were broken.
Surviving the challenges I faced during my married life and bringing up three children alone, allowed me the freedom to chase my dreams of being a writer and turn my failures into triumphs. I now share my thoughts and experiences via my personal development blog and self-help books in the hope I can help other women be the best they can be. We are all capable of so much if we recognise our potential and do something about it.
Facing my darkest fears head on was the toughest challenge I ever faced, but it reaped the greatest rewards.
Author and Blogger
If you would like to read more from Shelley, then take a look at her personal development blog http://www.motivatemenow.co.uk